Hessian Blitz
30th September 2011, 10:29 PM
Hi Mum just a quick note as the clan is busy training for BF3.
Training today was all about communication being key. Not for scrims or squad work in matches at all but for abusing people in the pub servers when we own there asses. Every griever and whining comment must be answered with “you’re a whining bitch” or “you’re just a noob”, my favorite is “Little Miss no skills”. Lt Spawn Camper explained to me that’s how squad death match works, the strong survive and the weak public scum die. You see Mum its natural selection working as it should. Just like when I catch Molly as she’s slower than me.
Weapons Training – before our last training session we had a clan group hug so we can bond together more. I was really looking forward to weapons training as I liked using the shotty on the farm for wabbit hunting. I was soon disappointed as we had a selection of just two weapons. The MG3 and Garl AT rocket launcher. I thought the clan must be on a strict budget but I learned later that these were the best for spamming the crap out of other players.
The clan thinks of everything including nutrition. Capt Sloops4Dina introduced me to the champion of breakfasts. A 1.5 Lt Coke a Big Ben Pie and a pack of sultana pasties. At LAN’s we also have fish&chips, pies, chocolate bars and donuts anything really to keep us constipated so as to be on a heightened level of awareness. As the new guy I get to shout the clan.
It seems we have some competition on our hands as for the first time in a while we have been out numbered on the BC2 servers. The “invalid” clan has made a play to dominate all the ON3 servers. These bastards are everywhere they seem to multiply faster than wabbits or squirrels, whichever multiplies faster.
Before this new clan turned up we could gangbang our way through the servers and not even the admins could stop us. It seems that we might have a fight on our hands for the control of the BF3 Beta servers. We have complained to the admins about this new clan but they have done nothing.
Well mum I’m off to bed to get some much needed sleep so I can help the clan fight the good fight against this new upstart clan.
Your loving son Fresh Meat
Training today was all about communication being key. Not for scrims or squad work in matches at all but for abusing people in the pub servers when we own there asses. Every griever and whining comment must be answered with “you’re a whining bitch” or “you’re just a noob”, my favorite is “Little Miss no skills”. Lt Spawn Camper explained to me that’s how squad death match works, the strong survive and the weak public scum die. You see Mum its natural selection working as it should. Just like when I catch Molly as she’s slower than me.
Weapons Training – before our last training session we had a clan group hug so we can bond together more. I was really looking forward to weapons training as I liked using the shotty on the farm for wabbit hunting. I was soon disappointed as we had a selection of just two weapons. The MG3 and Garl AT rocket launcher. I thought the clan must be on a strict budget but I learned later that these were the best for spamming the crap out of other players.
The clan thinks of everything including nutrition. Capt Sloops4Dina introduced me to the champion of breakfasts. A 1.5 Lt Coke a Big Ben Pie and a pack of sultana pasties. At LAN’s we also have fish&chips, pies, chocolate bars and donuts anything really to keep us constipated so as to be on a heightened level of awareness. As the new guy I get to shout the clan.
It seems we have some competition on our hands as for the first time in a while we have been out numbered on the BC2 servers. The “invalid” clan has made a play to dominate all the ON3 servers. These bastards are everywhere they seem to multiply faster than wabbits or squirrels, whichever multiplies faster.
Before this new clan turned up we could gangbang our way through the servers and not even the admins could stop us. It seems that we might have a fight on our hands for the control of the BF3 Beta servers. We have complained to the admins about this new clan but they have done nothing.
Well mum I’m off to bed to get some much needed sleep so I can help the clan fight the good fight against this new upstart clan.
Your loving son Fresh Meat